Mushrooms, Magnets, Massages

More: Magic, myth, miracle, music, moon, mystic, mystery, mighty, mountain, movement, motion, mate, model, matter, molecule, minimalist, mind, mantra, mood, maintain, mend, mercy, method, medicine, M&M’s. These are also M words.

When you think of mushrooms, do you think of energy? When you think of magnets, do you think of energy? When you think of massages, do you think of energy?  

Wellllllllllll, why the hell not? These three M words  are- at the core– scientifically intricate models or methods of energy storage and transfer. When in the right hands (literally) and harnessed and handled with care, the transfer of positive energy can spark amazing things. Problems become identified and relieved of their life sucking duties. Let’s dive into the magical world of mushrooms first. 

Mushrooms are super cool, because they are super complicated and interesting. I have read many books and had many conversations and watched many documentaries detailing the study of mushrooms, also referred to as Mycology. I think the best recommendation I can give for any beginner and aspiring Mycologist is a documentary called Fantastic Fungi (for those who appreciate F words). 

I have mushrooms all over my house in the form of décor- tapestries, cookie jars, chalk art on my black kitchen walls, wooden carvings, salt and pepper shakers, coffee mugs, dinner plates, nightlights (inspired by A Bug’s Life), and so forth. I wouldn’t say I am obsessed (although holy hell, after looking at this list), but I definitely appreciate pretty much everything about them. They keep me happy, because they keep me… grounded- which we will DIG into a little later. Things that keep me grounded and happy are what I welcome into my home space.

My cousin- an incredibly gifted and intelligent dude- has spent years studying mushrooms and their healing properties. His uncle (my landlord, a 70-something year old retired diesel mechanic who lost his only son to an insanely rare disease) just had a terrible bout of pneumonia and was in the hospital (rare for him) for days. After coming home, he had a package of Chaga mushrooms waiting on his doorstep, with detailed instructions for steeping in hot tea. He was out working in the garden again within a week. A few weeks later (and a couple of days ago), he was removing an old hot water heater and installing a brand new one into my small closet, which was- as he put it- a job. I helped a little, but he did the real labor and I was amazed- and grateful.

Another story of healing occurred fairly recently to yours truly. Ever since I was an adult, I have experienced acne issues. I have tried so many things to alleviate the pain and embarrassment that my face was bringing, and spent hundreds of dollars on products in attempts to cure and cover up my skin. In addition to a soap that I developed myself which took years and many trials and errors in producing (my mother is an aromatherapist and gave me tons of material on various oils and their uses and properties), I coupled my morning and evening face washing ritual with some powder blends that contain these types of fungi: Chaga and Cordyceps. There are other natural ingredients in the mix as well, like Moringa and Hibiscus, and Camu Camu and Coconut. I add these powders to my morning coffee and daily coconut water.

I cannot describe the elation in relation to the powerful healing effects this regimen has had not just on my face- but my entire body. Nearly twenty years of sun damage, uneven complexion, acne scarring, and super oily, massive pores have been (literally/visibly) reduced so drastically that I no longer feel the need to cover my face. This, in turn, has only aided in healing my skin, as I no longer use unnatural products to hide my natural (ly ugly) face. Ha, just kidding… but in all seriousness, I cannot recommend my regimen enough to those of you who might also have this issue. I doubt I get any comments about this, but if anyone is interested in learning more about this, please comment and I would be happy to help you. I believe in this regimen and I’m not the only one that has experienced this kind of result. What is the result? Positive energy, my friends. When I feel more confident in my natural skin, the world around me feels more beautiful. Less masking, more smiling. Done and done. 

In addition to studying mushrooms through literature and videos, my daughter and I love studying mushrooms in their natural habitat, too. Every time we go on a hike, or any time we visit the front yard (often), we bend down close to our earth and get a more detailed view of these intricate creations that definitely serve outstanding purposes.

She likes to actually collect them to study them even more closely. I prefer leaving them be, maybe instead opting to snap a photo, but I think it’s pretty cool that she is also interested in the realm of quantum things. Imagine a sixteen year old asking for a Microscope for Christmas, rather than a car. Reminds me of my mama…

One such outstanding purpose has been used as early as humans have been using nature to heal various ailments- medicinal. As aforementioned, my cousin believes in the healing properties contained in these “more animalistic than plant-like, though they’re neither” creatures when used correctly. When the wrong mushroom is used for the wrong reason, however, a trip to the ER is a good idea. Mushrooms can kill you. Please don’t just pick a mushroom out of the ground and eat it. I will not be made responsible for your dumb actions or your resulting dumb medical bills. 

Medicine is a very loaded word, which obviously begins with an M- thank you for noticing… ugh. Western medicine seems as rigid as Chaga when you research naturopathic alternatives which have been put into practice for thousands and thousands of years, but have been dismissed out of the gate by medical professionals for a substantially lesser number of years. (Hello, Marijuana.) *I apologize for the over usage of words that begin with M. I realize how obnoxious this is becoming, but sometimes things are just, well… MEANT to be this way. Muahaha!!!

Much like the ever-expanding list of medicinal marijuana strands and their (unfamiliar?) names, mushrooms come in so many crazy varieties, too, which have a vast array of purposes. Mushrooms have way more skills and beneficial uses than the average human, I am totally convinced. Energy flows through this complex underground network, invisible to us here on the surface. But do a little DIGGING (see? we got to it eventually!), and you will discover a whole new world of possibilities which can definitely assist you in some way, shape, or form. Literally. This, then, takes us to the subject of Magnets. 

“Hey Google, define grounding.” Grounding, also known as earthing, is a topic that piqued my interest numerous years ago. I have discussed the topic with numerous friends. I had the pleasure of enlightening my health coach friend, and hopefully some halfway interested and definitely not skeptical listeners, on her health centered radio talk show. She then implemented this method of grounding in her routine and even performed some tests which proved to be conclusive in that it is definitely real and definitely works for her. I wrote a short story for my daughter almost a decade ago which included the concept of grounding, and how seemingly magical that everything around us becomes when we dive into the idea that all subatomic particles are connected- even while located at great distances. The force is strong. Our childlike wonders which were (perhaps) squashed in (probably) high school (might) eventually return to us (probably) with further reading.

Damnit Bobby, Bill Nye was right. Science is cool!

The concept of grounding is simple, really- the earth is a Magnet. There are two poles at opposite ends of our planet- polar opposites, if you will (and yes, you will, eventually). The earth charges many things, including the underground network of mushrooms. These mushrooms have electric charges that heal all kinds of things. When we put our bare feet on the ground above this network, our bodies then become grounded, now connected to this network, resulting in increasingly positive and (some instantaneously) miraculous physical and mental functioning. Go ahead, try it. (How hard is it to take your shoes off and find a patch of earth to stand on these days?) 

After some period of time in CONDUCTING your little experiment, you may notice that benefits include less body inflammation, as well as relief from joint pain, ‘regular ass headaches’, other body pains in general, and observe other improvements like sounder, less interrupted sleep, stronger cardiovascular health. This could offer relief for mental burdening symptoms from the [dis]likes of depression.  

There are grounding products available for purchase on the interwebs if you aren’t into putting your naked feet on the naked ground (weirdo). Featured among these nice buys include grounding mats that you can place atop your mattress and underneath your bedsheet. YOU CAN GROUND IN YOUR SLEEP.

Much like the mushroom regimen becoming part of my routine, I have used this method of energy healing for about a year now. Whereas in the past when I previously awoke multiple times through the night either to tinkle or to groan with sharp back pains- now? No sir. I sleep all night long. I’ve discussed sleep in this blog before, and if you’ve been keeping up- you know: Sleep is very important to me. Sleeping on a grounding mat has not only improved this necessary and vital rejuvenation process, it has given me more than I could really have ever imagined (especially as it only cost me an embarrassingly small amount of thirty human doll’s). 

Magnets are cool for many reasons the same way mushrooms are cool. I enjoy science and learning more about things which can be harnessed and implemented for good. Motors, magnets, energy- all can be used together in a system. What we do with the system is up to the individual. These systems might also be dangerously evil/deadly if in the wrong hands. (Polar opposites. Now you get it.) Magnets can kill you. Magnets can also kill your electronic devices. (Listed in no particular order of importance.)

Like any other alternative solution that pharmaceutical and insurance companies hold zero authority or profit over, you will (barely) find limited scientific data or peer reviewed scholarly articles that can be paid for with your hard-earned money in your quest for knowledge as it relates to healin’ what ails ya. Scientific journals that boast any credibility will likely not be your best sources in obtaining the literature and information you seek. You will instead find the ancient wealth of knowledge relating to alternative medicine in blogs way better than my own, or by word of mouth… and probably from that of a hippie/witch.

My hope is that you are at least open and willing enough to give these things a chance, and at the very least are somewhat appreciative that I’m spreading my gospel without asking a dime in return. (Rare thing in these parts- both on and offline.)

Speaking of being appreciative, I cannot say enough of my longtime friend whom I first met as a neighbor and school pal at the age of five. We have also worked together as adults, and while we took on daytime roles as baristas, she was also in Massage Therapy school, and I was cleaning a mental health facility at night. (If you’ve been a long-time reader or been paying any attention at all, this is where start from the bottom and work your way up* comes from). My body and brain were very tired. Luckily, I got to play the role of her regular practice dummy. Also luckily, she is naturally gifted in the art of Massage. *Speaking of starting from the bottom and working your way up, this chick owns her own practice now and is certified in much more than general massage therapy. Her continuing education has led to numerous specialty certifications. Reiki, or energy healing, is just one of many examples of this. I am immensely proud of and inspired by my frand

I helped this frand study the basics of Massage Therapy during the humble “hey, can I use your internet?” early stages of her schooling, and this is another method of healing that I highly recommend to anyone with the means.

There were numerous examples she would recount to me involving clients even experiencing emotional breakthroughs while being massaged. Think about a person (me) who has experienced some kind of body trauma, and after a few sessions, feeling near total relief in an area that has been bothering them (me) for years. It does get emotional, really. (Hippa is definitely something we take seriously so I want to assure folks that situations are discussed, not the personal details that would identify the individual. Scouts honor.)
 
After having the opportunity to work as a front desk receptionist at the mental health facility was realized, another M word became prevalent in my life- Migraines.  

Migraines suck all ass! If you have ever had a headache and called it a migraine, first of all- stfu. Secondly, I was just joking about the stfu part but, thirdly, and seriously… S. T. F. U. 

Migraines are the devil. A period of three or four months of experiencing a true migraine every so often was enough for me. I really am not a fan of taking synthetic drugs so imagine me gagging down an Excedrin Migraine tablet or two in desperation to release this demon that has possessed my entire body, starting with my trauma riddled and highly overstimulated/stressed brain. Working this intensely stressful and high paced and under paid/appreciated job was conjuring the actual devil in my mind. (Not really, but that is what a migraine feels like.)

As mentioned in an older post, I tend to not ask for assistance in times of need, and so I wrestled this demon for several months, knowing the causes, but also knowing the shit wasn’t getting any better with me being stuck in the position I was in. Also, as mentioned in an even more decrepit post, you’ll read about how I stopped working in mental healthcare to take a job I enjoyed.

Fast forward to the here and now, you might understand why. Also, you may know that I work in mental healthcare again. You may learn now that there are aspirations within me to continue my education at some point in an effort to be of better service to people who have problems.

How may I help you? has been savagely beaten into my brain for a very, very long time. How I still maintained the raw desire to follow thru with this ever present task is far beyond me.

Aaaaand back to the before times– I talked to, and initially rejected, my Massage Therapist pal one night. She was supposed to come over and I told her “No sir, I got a migraine”. Click. She came over anyway and put a spot of peppermint oil on my temples, and then started going to work on the back of my neck. You want me to mention emotional breakthrough again? Alright. 

I began crying as I noticed the migraine being reduced to a headache, and finally subsiding altogether. This whole process took maybe thirty minutes from start to finish. Another Miracle. Another M word

Look, I’m not a Medical Doctor. I’m not even remotely knowledgeable in general compared to most people, I presume. But when I was five years old, I was asked what I wanted to be when I grow up, and Doctor was my immediate response. I enjoy helping others. I have experienced so much which has resulted in my searching for answers. These answers continue to help me

I may not be able to write you a Prescription, but I can write you a Doctor’s Excuse. That’s the power of a receptionist. And this Message I share with you now is the power of a receptionist’s courage, who hopes the pain that has been inflicted upon her and the tools that alieve them will inspire you to try new things to relieve your pain. So start from the bottom and work your way up if you have to, but whatever you do, Meditate on it first. 

That’s a whole ‘nuther post on energy healing for another day. Hmm! Monday it is! 

Moron.

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